Monday, January 24, 2005

Hippopotamuses Suck!

Hippopotamuses come across as such cuddly, friendly creatures. You see cartoon drawings of a Hippo and you go, "Hey, so cute!" but in truth, these creatures are anything but cuddly or friendly.

Last week, Mae and I caught a short snippet of an animal documentary at National Geographic Channel. The narrator tells us that Hippos are territorial creatures and proceeds to show us a "rarely recorded footage".

In the video, we see a mother Hippo and her little cub approaching a herd with the intention of being assimilated in this new community. Unfortunately a young Hippo, the alpha male of the group, has different ideas. He gets all worked up and proceed to attack Mom and Baby. Mom pushes Baby away and they're making a getaway under water when suddenly poor Baby Hippo gets separated from his mother. Alpha Male then grabs Baby by his teeth and shakes about, threshing the little cub around. Mae and I watched in shock as the struggling baby Hippo finally succumbs to the attack and sinks lifelessly into the depths of the river. That's when our parental instincts kicked in and we started screaming curses at the TV. Hehhehh... okay, so I was the only one. :)

So, the next time you see those Blue Hyppo ads on TV and you think, "What a cute fella," know that nothing could be further from the truth. Hippos are in fact the bastards of the animal kingdom. These savage beasts will stop at nothing to be at the top of their social order. We should send a bunch of Chinese fellas to eat up these vicious buggers. That ought to teach them!

Heh! We Chinese will eat any damn thing.

30 comments:

  1. won't take make us Chinese more vicious than the hippos then? :lol:

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  2. won't that, i mean.
    typo. that's the problem when you have lightning fingers - they go fast but not very accurate with their strikes. heh!

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  3. Hehhe...Hyppo's are cute lah...They look so sluggish and lazy in the mud. I can't imagine them being such beasts. Oh well..maybe I didn't watch the documentary and maybe if I did, it'll change my perception of those cute little beings :P So I guess Jesse is not gonna get a Hyppo soft toy from you and Mae anymore huh..hehehe :)

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  4. territorial rights will turn all animals into a mad psychotic behaviour. same goes for humans. hehe

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  5. Ever since I read somewhere that hippos kill more people than any other wild animal in Africa, I could never look at them the same way again.
    Especially the dastardly Blue Hyppo. He is evil. Very very evil.

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  6. I saw it too! I was horrified. I think I actually yelled at the TV too. Apparently it was called 'rarely seen footage' because infanticide is quite rare among hippos. Damn, it was nasty.

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  7. Saw the same footage on Astro last year. Now only they are on TV? Hehhe.
    Anyway, like they say, it is a very rare incident for the male hippo to attack its young.
    This baby hippo is just "yong sui". Tough luck.

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  8. Aiyoh...all the time I had wrong perception of the cuddly hippo la? But then, like Oli said, humans are also like that too sometimes.

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  9. Trust No One.. should be changed to trust No Animals too..
    Yeah. have heard a lot about Hippo's being vicious. I remember watching this cartoon/musical a long time ago about hippos. I can't remember what it was, showed hippos as being cute and cuddly and very caring creatures.
    Well, with mouths that big, better watch out man.

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  10. Aiyah. what can be worse than humans leh? Not even hippos.

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  11. Hubby and I LOVE hippos! We collect hippo plush toys and other hippo-related stuff and we go crazy whenever we see documentaries of hippo on TV! :D
    I've seen the documentary you wrote about and yes, it was so sad to see that baby hippo killed :(

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  12. If the Chinese eat the hippos, who will end up eating the Chinese???

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  13. my baby sueanne is trashing her lamaze hippo toy. goood girl ;)

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  14. good point, who is going to eat those Chinese? Does this mean they are top of the animal kingdom food chain? No wonder why Chinese dont really die of hungry anywhere in this world... :))

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  15. the blue hyppo freaks me out. seriously. hey didya see the documentary on the big crocs? even they're afraid of hippos!!

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  16. Who says we're not, Fly? :)
    No hippos for Jesse, Cherry! :lol:
    Spot on, Oli. We're all animals lah!
    Nothing good can come out of a blue hippo, Sashi. We're doomed!!!
    Yeah Jordan, I still can't get it out of my head!
    It wasn't "his" young, Gina.
    Yah Lillian, don't let those baby fats fool you!
    Hehh, good point PaulOs. Big mouths are dangerous - even on humans. Hehhheh!
    Yup, Mdmafia, we're on the top AND the bottom of the food chain!
    Ariel, you ought to go to the Night Safari in Taiping. They've got a family of these vicious buggers. :)
    Anjali, some Chinese eat other Chinese. :lol: *ahaks*
    Buaya: Good girl! :)
    Erei, I'm Chinese and I'm hungry all the time. :lol:
    Ah9: You bet.

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  17. There's a Night Safari in Taiping? Cool!

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  18. Actually the female hippo was telling the alpha male that the kid is his. She demanded a ludicrous amount of money for child support and ask that he abandon all his harem of female hippos. Big mistake. Looks like child support is out of the question now.

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  19. I saw it too, was shocked out of my senses. The poor baby was mangled!! Sat staring at the screen for a full 3 minutes before i decided to change the channel :)

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  20. But i dun remember seeing any dish that is cook of hippo thou

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  21. James, we chinese don't eat anything out of greed but for a reason. For eg. hippo reproductive organs may have aphrodiasic values, hippo tongue may give you the sharp wit that you have, hippo brain may give you patience when you have a complain against TmNet.......

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  22. ohhh did u know tht hippos show respect to the dominant male by flicking their poop with their tails onto his face?? i mean realli fresh from the mill poop. Hahahha. Now who wants to let thier kids hav hippo toys wahahah.

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  23. We're humans! Commended to rule and subdue the earth! Muahahhaa.. we what we please.. but responsibly..
    Now I remember about the poop flinging thing.. Does Jesse do any poop flinging thing? Btw.. does he still do his "air-balls" thingo?

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  24. yeah.. we can eat em all.. Masters of the earth.. destined to subdue the earth.. muahahhaha
    Andrea thanks for the reminder about the poop flinging thing.. am reminded of it.. Does Jesse fling his poop at you James? Does he still like "Air Balls" ?

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  25. 3 minutes huh, Annu? I know. It was disturbing yet engaging. Hehheh!
    Heh! Hippos probably don't taste that great Jason!
    :lol: Mumsgather, I think Hippo brains will lead you to attack young kids!
    Hahhahahha, now that's a informative piece of news, Andrea.
    Yes Paulos. He likes airballs. :)

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  26. Hey, my Hippo+Giraffe (Hippograffe) soft toy is cute. Hehe.. and he's got a name, Abimelech.

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  27. eeee.. poor Baby Hippo. I didn't watch it, lucky me. If I did, I sure yell too.

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  28. Well, Yahkid, remember to keep the young 'uns away from him anyhoo! :)
    You would, Nana! :lol:

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  29. Haha, and I've got a friend who just happens to idolize Pat and Stanley's 'The Lion Sleeps Tonight'. :p

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