Thursday, June 30, 2005

A Midnight Adventure

Yesterday, close to midnight, Jesse was coughing quite a bit. So we decided to give him some cough mixture - administered orally with the help of a syringe. I injected half its contents into his little mouth. He tasted it and gave me a twisted look. And then he started twitching and writhing about. He hated the stuff.

"Shit," Mae exclaimed, "Looks like we'll have to force it down!" She gave me the look. Yes, the one that says this is my job. "Alright, I'll do it," I said as I cradled the boy in my arms. He knew it was coming. Mae held his little face and gave it a little squeeze to pucker up his lips. I put the syringe in his mouth and injected the syrup. He started kicking about. And then it came.

"Blueerrrkkkk!"

The boy's dinner of milk and dessert of mashed apples came a-spewing forth like a tragic night in Vesuvius. And you'd be surprised how much milk can such a small boy contain. There was puke everywhere. Down his shirt. On the floor. All over his father. It was chaos.

Mae froze, her mouth gaping wide and her eyes glazed over. Like a deer in headlights. "Move!" I called out to her. In retrospect, "Fetch!" might have been more appropriate. Hehehh! Armed with towels and rags and a change of clothes for Jesse, the king's horses and men put Humpty Dumpty together again. Strangely enough, after the explosion Jesse was having a good time - playing and picking at the larger pieces of his own puke. Euwwww!

And that was our midnight adventure. Let's hope we'll have no more puke today.

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Vis-A-Visa

This is serious. Via Mack.

There's a blog residing in www.visa.com.my and it does not belong to Visa - yes, that Visa you have in your wallet. Turns out that the company is now demanding from blogger Blewtooth, said owner of visa.com.my, to surrender the domain name as it infringes Visa's international trademark.

While I'm not an expert on the subject, I have had some dealings with our local trademark office down at Dayabumi, KL. Technically speaking, nobody can have an exclusive right to a generic term. Which means to say that if you went to any trademark offices anywhere in the world to register, say the name "Shit" for your branding of fecal by-products, you wouldn't get very far. Generic designations are not registrable nor protectable.

However, if a trademark happens to be a generic term (or an ordinary, dictionary word) like Visa, or Apple, or Tiger but has been used long enough in a particular market to be considered a famous mark and a well-known commercial name in that market, the common law in that market will honour it and thereby protect the trademark from being diluted or abused by another commercial entity which tries to ride on the success of an established mark. This law also safeguards consumers from being duped. Which basically means that visa.com.my doesn't stand a very good chance of winning this one, even if it is not a commercial entity. The court would probably rule that Visa customers might be misled into thinking that Blewtooth's blog is indeed an official publication of Visa the company.

Also, despite a few well-meaning readers who suggest that Blewtooth requests compensation to release the domain name, it is probably not a good idea. Visa's lawyers will probably bite you in the ass with their cybersquatting watchdog and say that you intend to profit in bad faith from the goodwill of a trademark belonging to someone else.

I know how tempting it must be to be a small guy standing up the the establishment. I often romanticise the notion of being David against the Goliaths of the world, that is, until reality gives me a kick in the groin. Reminds me of the time when I had lawyers breathing down my neck over my blog. Despite having friends and lawyers assure me that its nothing more than an empty threat, I decided to let it go.

My sympathies go out to Blewtooth. But think about it, dude. Do you really need the grief?

UPDATE: There's a precedent here!

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Euro Deli-cious!


one man's meat

Last week, we celebrated Josh and Paul's birthday at Euro Deli, Damansara Kim. Euro Deli, as the name implies, is a delicatessen that serves a continental menu. This place is as non-halal as they come, as a big portion of the menu is dedicated to the pig. I'll just let the pictures speak for themselves.


From left to right. Julia grinning at the prospect of stuffing her face with pig. Someone ordered sausage. Lina fends of the paparazzi with her bread while Rina looks on.


I can't remember what this is but it's pig. Amy, Josh's wife exclaims at the prospect of stuffing her face. This one is pork chops, I think.


Mae's order of pork medallions. Jesse astounds at the prospect of his parents stuffing their faces. Daddy gets the last pork knuckle of the day. Think of it as a huge chunk of siew yoke


Somebody orders the double barrel. :) Big birthday boys, Josh and Paul and their dainty little cakes.

Mae and I usually go to the one in Damansara Utama. I never blogged about it cos, until today, I never got any good shots of the food there. This time is no exception. But thanks to the miracle of Photoshop, you can at least see something. :)

Go, go, eat eat!

Monday, June 27, 2005

Man Eating Fish


captain ahab meets his match

I always regarded Sushi and Sashimi as girlie food. I mean, girls just dig the stuff. These dainty little delights are small, colourful and you always look cute eating them. And besides they rationalise, what harm can a cute little morsel like that do to your waistline? Of course most women conveniently forget that they're scoffing down 20 of these lil' suckers at a go. :)

Anyway, despite being the manly-man that I am, I confess to have a weakness for Salmon and Tuna Sashimi. I mean, damn, the stuff is good. And there's something... erm... savage about a man stuffing his face with raw fish. Hurrr hurr hurrrhh!!!!

We bought the above at Jusco over the weekend. RM 19.90 gets you 11 slices of fresh Salmon, a dollop of Wasabi, a sachet of soy sauce, a green plastic leaf and a yellow plastic flower. You can also get 7 slices for 14.90. That works out to approximately RM 1.80 a slice. It's expensive considering there's no cooking whatsoever. Damn ripoff. This can only be an occasional treat.

"Get the small one, you know I'll just take one or two," Mae tells me. I get the big one anyway. She proceeds to eat 5 slices. Feh! So much for "one or two"!

Walk the Talk


where's the fire?


Over the weekend, we bought Jesse a little firetruck. It's a pretty cool toy. There's a hose up front that blows bubbles. There are all kinds of other nifty little buttons - one plays nursery rhymes, another switches on the signal lights, yet another switches on the siren. There's even a walkie-talkie thingy there that records and plays back your own voice. And it comes with a bona fide fireman helmet too!

And whaddya know, turns out the boy liked the helmet best. *sigh*

Actually, we didn't just buy the firetruck on a whim (though Mae think I'm really buying this for myself). Jesse just turned 10 months old yesterday, and from the looks of things it doesn't seem like he's gonna be walking anytime soon. He used to try walking whenever we lifted him up on his feet, but these days he'd just sit back down. So we thought we'd give him a little encouragement. Apparently, ride-on toys help. Kids get on and they're motivated to go places (for some reason, kids have places they want to go), hence they walk!

But I think Jesse's a lost cause here. His favourite activity for the last few days has been turning and flipping his helmet on the ground and crawling after it. Hehhh!

Oh well, at least we'll be entertained by his monkey antics. :)

Friday, June 24, 2005

At the PPS Birthday Bash

Boy, it was packed. I would have liked to have met more people but I'm a bit of wet blanket so I stayed safe in my little corner sucking away at my beer.

FIRST LOOK
The first person I saw when I got there was Lucia. Somehow she seemed like such a familiar face so I went right up to her to say hi. "Who the f..?" she looked perplexed. "I'm James and this is Mae," I said sheepishly. :)

I met Peter. We shook hands and I was suddenly tongued-tied in the presence of this inspiring gentlemen. "Erm... I better go sign in," I told him and led Mae off into the place. On the way I met Bob and his wife, Elaine. Mae and Elaine clicked right away since they've met previously. :)

HEAD HONCHO
I met Aizuddin. He looked exactly like his pictures. Mae is convinced she's met him somewhere. "Maybe I went to school with him in PJ," she said. Feh! This had better not be something behind my back, or heads will roll. Hhehheh! Right there with Aiz at the registration table, I also met this lovely lady Ifzan or Izan, I never quite got her name. And it didn't feel polite to stare at her boob to look at her nametag.

THE SHOOTERS
We then said hi to Jolene who cornered us into taking a photo with her. But I now officially hate her cos she's taller than me. We also took a shot with Huai Bin, which you will find on his blog. But as you can see, when he was shooting us something was wrong with his camera. For some reason, I look uglier than usual in his shot. Dude, get a new camera, okay? Here's what we look like in real life:


with a good camera, we look just like
george clooney and zhang ziyi

THE FAMILIAR FACES
When we met Jeff Ooi, we were truly in the presence of greatness. I mean, that was a great plate of steak he was about to wolf down. Hehh! But don't fret Jeff, you're not so bad yourself. And congrats on the win.

Congrats also to Kenny Sia. I went up to him before the award. "Can you please take off your clothes, so we can be absolutely sure it's really you?" I enquired. He obliged by flashing his navel at us. "That guy is damn hairy," Mae told me later. He was. So was Minishorts - at least that what I think. She was to have come in nothing, but her nothing turned out to be her t-shirt. Damn cop out! And I brought my wife all the way just to see that (we're kinky, what can I say?). I'm considering legal action.

She also pointed out April to me, and proceeded to be the middleman of my short conversation with the young lady. I would have gone up to shake her hand but that might have appeared too eager and Mae would have ended the night with a cold beer down my pants. :)

AT THE BAR
Irene was already inside so we said hi to her. She's more dressy than we remember her. But then again the last time we met her was at our home. :)

Ben was at the bar. "You know my blog?" he didn't believe me. I've read his once or twice and I only know him as Tormentt. Equally tormented was his buddy, Clifford. Clifford was not a blogger but as he said, "After tonight, I will be."

Lainie and Fip were at the bar. But for some reason, I did not see Nessa. You always see Nessa in Lainie's blog. Oh well.

ALSO AT THE BAR
Andreas stood right next to me to order his beer. It took him awhile to finally make the connection that I was that James from LoopyMeals. It also took him awhile to grasp who Mae was. Hmm... somebody stop this man from drinking, please!

We met Jordan and his lovely wife Leen, which made me very conscious of my crooked teeth. Leen's a dentist. The whole time I talked to them, I tried to keep my lips as tightly shut as I could.

THE LEGEND
We were like a couple of groupies when we met TV Smith. Even as we put on a facade of calm, collected demeanour, we were cheering inside. I had read his blog even before it was a blog. You kids may not remember this, but back then TV had a website with an Immigration Checkpoint on the front page. Oh boy.

ONE FOR THE ROAD
We left soon after the closing. We had promised Roma we would be home by 10 pm but as things went, we stayed up till 11-ish. We were on our way out when the beer inside of me decided to come out. :) So I made a dash for the john. There I met Simon. He was all flush and his face was wet. He must have been crying - overwhelmed, no doubt, by his win last night. Hehheh. Congrats dude!

ON HINDSIGHT
The bash was as fun as it could have gotten. But as KY had pointed out, an MC might have helped mixed us up a little more. Mae and I are friendly people but we're not exactly social animals. We're also awfully shy. *sigh* And we ended up not meeting a lot of people we would have like to have met.

From afar, I saw Shaolin Tiger putting a Tiger in his tank. Along with him were Kimberly, Suanie and God whose reputations were impressed upon me as a newbie chatter on Dalnet's Malaysia & Mamak channels. For some reason, I was too malu to approach them. Sorry folks. Looking at some of the photos, it turned out that Galvin was also there. Strange, the one guy I know from this gang, I didn't see. Hmph!

I recognised KY from his blog. I spotted him passing me by once and never saw him again. Any guy who builds his own koi pond is good guy, in my books. I also saw Mack but never got to shake his hand. I had this mental image of an old, distinguished and Malay gentleman whenever I read his blog. Well, one out of three ain't bad. Heh.

BLOGGERCON 2006
The rest of you, I didn't have the privilege to meet. So many people, so little time. Maybe next year. Judging by the sound of things last night, we may have a National Blogger Convention next year. After you, Mr. Aizuddin.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Eyewitness Account: PPS Birthday Bash

Yes! I was at the Project Petaling Street 2nd Anniversary Birthday Bash (PPS2ABB) tonight and I rushed home to blog about it, just so I can leave the first ping! Bwahahahahah! Somebody gimme a kiasu award!

Update at 24 June 2005, 12:07am
I noticed a spike in the hits just because of my ping. So I figured I better write something more substantial before anyone sends me hate-mail or something. :)

Mae and I got there at 9:00pm. Parking was impossible. We ended up parking at the Selangor Club right behind Merdeka Square. Charlie's is a lovely place. Very cosy and rustic. Unfortunately, we turned out to be a big group. By the time we got there, there must have been 50-70 people there. As you can imagine, both air-cond and Charlie's staff were overworked. People were everywhere. In the pub. Outside on the yard (can I say yard?). In the gallery (the place had a nice art gallery). And all the blogging luminaries were there. It was like some crazy Hollywood event. Cameras were flashing everywhere!

It seemed like everyone had brought a camera. That's when I kicked myself in the ass. Of all the bloody days to forget my camera. *sigh* But I suppose, by tomorrow, the whole of PPS will be buzzing with photos and news and stuff.

Okay. More tomorrow. Watch this space. :)

Abducted Baby Found

On Sunday, the story of a newborn infant abducted from the Sungai Petani Hospital was frontpaged in the Star. The boy had not even been named yet.

Today at 4:00 am, the baby was found. The nurse did it. It is believed that she abducted the infant as her own child had died.

Mae and I really feel for the parents Noryati Abu Bakar, 31 and Mohamad Nordin Derais, 34. If the same had happened to us, I'm not sure we would be able to handle it. Thank God the baby was found. Kudos to the Police for breaking the case, and to the Star for highlighting it. And may God bless this family.

When the story broke on Sunday, hospitals all over the country tightened their security. Well, it's about damn time! Parents should never have to worry about the safety of their babies in the care of the hospitals. All hospital nurseries should adhere to the following safety measures:

  • Password/passcard activated door to nursery

  • Sentry post inside nursery

  • CCTV inside and outside nursery

  • Restricted entrance pass to dedicated nurses only

  • No unsupervised transfer of baby from nursery by parents or relatives

  • Security ID for nurses handling babies

  • But aside from these obvious security measures, hospitals also need to check on the background of their staff. In the Sungai Petani case, was the nurse in question ever given psychiatric evaluation after the loss of her child? Was she given proper psychiatric care? Should she have been transferred to a different department, instead of being in one that might further "aggravate" her loss?

    What she did was wrong. But yet, I can't help but feel pity for the poor woman. I can only hope she will get the necessary medical attention for her condition. That's the least anybody can do for her now.

    Tuesday, June 21, 2005

    Rojak Post

    I'm usually very focused (some say anal-retentive) in my blogging in the sense that I usually stick to one topic. But right now there are a whole bunch of things that are bursting to come out of my brains.

    THE FATHERS' DAY THAT WAS
    Mae and Jesse got me a nice Braun Buffel wallet. This is the beauty of having small children - you can take their money and buy stuff for yourself on your birthday, fathers' day, anniversary, etc. and they can do a damn thing about it. Wahahah! We didn't really celebrate but we did buy Mae's dad a nice dinner. As for me, I somehow feel that I haven't earned the right to have someone throw me a Fathers' Day bash just yet. So far, all I've done is put my... erm... genetic material into Mae and voila, all of a sudden I'm a father. Maybe by next year I'd be more deserving. Heh!

    CELEBRITY BLOGGERS
    Yesterday I flipped open the Star and oh, the horror! Hehehhh! Congratulations to Suanie, Minishorts, Kenny Sia, Peter and Aizuddin, and thanks for putting blogs in the minds of Malaysians. Congrats also to Jeff Ooi for the recent win. I'm sure it was my vote that made the difference. Hehhehh! It is my honour to share my ping on the same page on PPS as you fellas.

    PPS 2nd ANNIVERSARY BASH
    I'm really dying to go. Maybe Mae and I will pop by for a drink or two. If we do go, it'll be a short one. :)

    THE BOY SAYS APPLE
    Mae called me a short while ago. "Jesse said 'Apple'," she screamed over the phone. "He grabbed the tomato flashcard and said 'Apple'." I guess the boy's not too bright. But then again, the tomato in our Fruits & Vegetables Flashcards does kinda look like an apple. Close enough, I guess. Also, I'm glad Jesse enjoys the flashcards we got for him. To him it's all a game, so he's having fun and learning stuff at the same time. If only all education was like that.

    COLLATERAL DAMAGE
    Jesse is at the stage where he leaves a trail of destruction everywhere he goes. He'd been biting my mobile phone, slathering his drool all over it. As a result, my Nokia isn't working so great these days. He also screwed up the CD tray of our stereo. Mae thinks it's great that I don't take it too badly that our son is destroying our stuff. Little does she know I'm actually plotting my revenge. When the boy gets his first car, he'll know what destruction is. Hehehh!

    GYM & LOSING WEIGHT
    In my first month at the gym, I lost 5kgs. Now, two months later, I've only lost another 1kg. *sigh* Truth is, I've been slacking. I was working out daily. These days, I'll be happy if I can squeeze in 3 days in a week. Also, I'm eating like a pig once again. I'm now at 80kgs. I prefer to be 72kgs. This is an uphill task for a glutton such as I. God give me strength.

    INITIAL-D THE MOVIE
    Mae and I will be watching this at a client's special preview screening. I'm not a big fan of Chinese movies but this one is directed by Andrew Lau and Alan Mak, the guys who brought us Infernal Affairs. So I fully expect this to rock. And if it doesn't I'll throw popcorn at the screen. :)

    HALOSCAN, WE HAVE A PROBLEM
    Is there a problem with Haloscan or it is just me? On several occassions I replied to the comments, submitted my comments only to find that it has mysteriously disappeared. This sucks. And not in a good way too.

    Ugh! There's the rojak post. Not the most elegant piece I've ever written, but then again, when have I ever written anything remotely elegant? Still, it was therapeutic for me. Oh yah, I did intend to put in some links but I got lazy. Sue me.

    Monday, June 20, 2005

    Bad Day Brewing

    What a day it has been. I'm pooped out just thinking about the events of the morning. Mae and I decided we would leave the house an hour earlier today. She had to catch the train to the city, I had to send my car in for repairs and we would be dropping Jesse and Roma at my mother-in-laws. My car was at the in-laws and I was driving Mae's mom's Kelisa.

    As if an early morning didn't suck bad enough, everything that could possibly go wrong, went wrong. Mae got ready very early on. But when it was my turn to hit the shower, for some reason water supply to the entire apartment building was cut! My only consolation was that I hadn't begun taking my bath. Can you imagine having soap all over your hair and body and then running out of water? Ugh!

    Traffic was bad. The electronic signboard on the LDP informed us that some car had broken down somewhere along the expressway. And so a 20 minute trip ended up taking an hour.

    Along the way, poor Jesse got hungry and we were only halfway to his grandma's house. And so Mae mix-up a bottle of formula and Roma fed him. Unfortunately, that proved to be a big mistake since my the short-wheel-base on my mother-in-law's car proved to be a bumpy ride. And that, as you might guess, is never the ideal condition to feed a child.

    Poor little Jesse was wailing from discomfort. Roma and Mae were flustered and my blood pressure was at boiling point. And suddenly, the poor kid popped his load. *bluerk* He puked all over Roma which gave her quite the shock. Mae scrambled to comfort Jesse and help Roma. Me, I maintained order - snapping instructions at my panic-stricken wife and our puke-covered domestic helper while trying in vain to comfort them all. Through it all, the boy was screeching like banshee on the loose. It was a madhouse in that little car. By then we had arrived at the LRT station. Poor Mae was worried sick about our kid. "Go, I'll take care of it," I assured, sounding every bit like a corny hero from a cheesy B-grade movie.

    Thankfully, five minutes later, Jesse, Roma and I arrived at my MIL's. The moment Roma stepped out of the car, Jesse stopped crying. I grabbed my puke-ridden kid and hugged him to bits. He turned to me and gave me his signature shit-eating grin, flashing his two brand new pearly whites. As he did that, clouds parted in the sky and the sun shone through, basking father and son in its glorious morning beam. It was gonna be an okay day after all.

    That was two hours ago. It's 11:00 am and for some reason I'm still here at the Citroen workshop waiting for my car. And even as my stinky, unbathed body festers away in this waiting room, a shitload of work and some pretty unreasonable deadlines await me at the office.

    There better be water when I get home tonight or heads will roll!

    Wednesday, June 15, 2005

    Whose Yo Daddy?

    Mae's recently learnt from a friend, a technique in getting Jesse to repeat certain words. "Buh-buh-buh-Ball," Mae would say to Jesse, repeating the consonant three times. And everytime she did it, the boy would stare in wonderment at her lips. Then out of the blue he went, "Bahl!" We clapped and cheered like idiots.

    Until it hit me that my son said "Ball" before he even tried "Daddy". Hmph.

    Mae took pity on me and tried to teach him. "Duh-duh-duh-Daddy!" But Jesse was not impressed. "Bahl," the word rolled of his lips with ease, as if to mock me. "Jesse, say 'Daddy'," I cried in one last futile attempt. Then he turned his little head towards me and gave me his angelic little smile. "Bahl!" It was hopeless.

    Over the last few days, he came close. "Duh-duh," he'd say. He didn't mean it, of course. He was playing with the remote at the time, or doing something equally inane.

    This morning I was playing with him when he suddenly stopped and said, "Deh-deh!" I grabbed him, gave him a big bear hug and blew a raspberry in his little neck. He squealed like a little monkey.

    I tried to get him to repeat it but the boy refused, preferring instead to amuse himself with Mommy's tube of hand cream. Still, it was good enough for me. I'm still grinning from this morning. :)

    Monday, June 13, 2005

    Makan-Makan Petaling St.


    to die for


    My momma was in town till yesterday. On Saturday, we decided to bring her to one of my favourite food haunts in KL - Seng Kee. The place is situated along Jalan Sultan which is where the old Rex Cinema used to be and runs parallel with Petaling Street (the place, not the blogtal). The shop sits in front of the Furama Hotel.



    This place has been around forever. Like the sign says, the signature dishes here are the Claypot Loh Shu Fun, superb Yong Tow Foo and their fantastic Crispy Roast Pork Noodles. While Seng Kee found fame with it's Claypot Loh Shu Fun - a rice noodle cooked in a claypot with a generous helping of braised mince pork and pork liver, it must be said that the standard has dropped over the years. It's not all bad, just not all great. However, the Yong Tow Foo is still excellent. Yong Tow Foo is a fish patty stuffed into various veggies including chillies, okra, eggplant. I especially love the stuffed chillies since this place deep fries the stuff, bringing out a unique aroma in an otherwise standard chinese hawker cuisine. :)



    To call Seng Kee a restaurant would be something of an understatement. When I ate here a decade back, Seng Kee was just a roadside shop with a few tables along the five-foot way of the shops on Jalan Sultan. Today, the tables are set along the corridors of some 7 or 8 shops. Seng Kee also rents the space of daytime restaurants for it's night time use. I usually sit in their Nam Heong space where it's air-conditioned.



    We ordered the shop's new specialty - the Cantonese Fried Sang Mein with Fish Patties. Fish patty is like fishball without the ball shape. While most good Chinese restaurants serve this, Seng Kee's fish patties are excellent. The patties here are deep-fried in a light batter and seasoned with Chinese five-spice powder. We also ordered a Braised (Mun) Sang Mein with Fish Fillet (Yue Phin). That was only okay.

    However, the current number one - which is the topmost picture on this post - is the Crispy Roast Pork Noodle (Siew Yoke Mein). In this dish, the roast pork is sauteed in dark soy sauce with bits of cruncy garlic slices. This is a heavenly accompaniment for the stir-fried Sang Mein noodles.

    Seng Kee operates from dinner time till the wee hours of the morning, about 2 - 3am. It's a great place to eat and not terrible expensive too. We paid RM 95 for a hearty meal for 7 of us. So much for my diet. *sigh*

    Friday, June 10, 2005

    Negaraku & the Universal Laws of Love

    I hardly ever blog about current affairs, other than the ones that happen in my own family. But this bit of news is a little hard to swallow. If you haven't already heard, our policymakers have decided to have our national anthem, "Negaraku" played at the cinemas. And now they're laying down the law:
    Anyone who shows disrespect when the Negaraku is played – either by refusing to stand, sing the anthem or cause a disturbance – can be fined RM100 or jailed up to month. 
    Let me give you an analogy. Ever since Jesse was born over nine months ago, Mae and I have been there for him. We feed him, clothe him, we put a roof over his head, and by God we'll break our backs to give him all that. And every so often, we hug him, cuddle him and play with him. Because we love him unconditionally. And even if he never loves us back, we could never love him less.

    Try as you might, you can't ever make anyone love you. It doesn't work that way. The best you can do is to create an environment of love around the object of your affection, and hope that he or she reciprocates. This is the Universal Law of Love, as conveyed to you by yours truly. *ahem* The first Universal Law of Love applies everywhere. Parents and babies. Boy and girl. Country and citizen. And even gods and humans.

    The second Universal Law of Love states that there ain't nothing as a sure thing. This means that just because you love someone with every ion in your body, doesn't guarantee that they'll love you back. This is a harsh reality of life that applies everywhere. Just because you get 13As doesn't mean you'll get a scholarship. People who fail to understand this are often devastated. They go to the ends of the earth for a girl or a guy only to find out that it didn't make a difference. So please, don't give me your kidneys and expect me to love you. Who needs the grief?

    The third Universal Law of Love is perhaps the most important. Forcing it never ever makes it better, it just makes it worse. Think about this for a second. Why do you think rape never caught on? You can't force love.Heh!

    The fourth Universal Law of Love is the only hope you have. Love sincerely, and hope for the best. Build a home on love, and perhaps your children will love you. Shower that girl with love, and maybe you'll wear down her defenses. Give good students scholarship, and perhaps they'll feel a little more patriotic.

    The final Universal Law of Love is a warning. It is also a solution to the problem of love. Disappointment will lead to resentment. Unrequited love will usually die away. If my wife starts yelling at and beating me up, pretty soon I might be tempted to find love elsewhere. Yes, having your wife beat you up can be disappointing. Hahahha!

    This is a long post, I know. And I'm not even close to being done yet. Because love is an important subject. At the risk of sounding like a Hippy or a cheesy Wet Wet Wet song, I'll state my stand: Love is all around. Everything revolves around love. You can love your mother, your wife, your child. You can love your job, your car, your cash. You can love your country. And if you're Big Cheese of the country, you can love your people.

    Love your people. By the way, I too, would like a 5% discount on the price of my house. *ahem*

    Here's a lovely verse from the bible, taken from 1 Corinthian 13:1-8 in the New International Version:
    Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
    Oh, incidentally, the King James Version of the good book uses the word "Charity" instead of "Love". That too, is worth a thought. As is James' Universal Laws of Love, compiled here for your convenience:
    1. You can't ever make anyone love you.
    2. In love, there ain't nothing as a sure thing.
    3. Forcing love never makes it any better.
    4. Love sincerely and hope for the best.
    5. Disappointment leads to resentment.
    Well, this is where I rack my brains for a memorable ending. A line that will... erm... seal this entry in your minds forever. But even as I do that, I'll be addressing that issue of getting a RM 100 fine or spending a month in jail for not respecting the national anthem. To our policymakers, I have this to say. When you've arrested those guys who didn't stand up for the "Negaraku", please remember this lovely, if overused cliche about love: If you love somebody, set them free. And perhaps then, they might find their way back to you.

    Now tell me, ain't love grand?

    No PPS Bash For Us!


    too young to smoke?


    It's Jesse's fault really. I just know he'll be up to no good should we decide to go to the PPS 2nd Anniversary Birthday Bash at Charlie's. Jesse is quick to pick up bad habits. Already the boy has developed a taste for beer (though that is largely my fault). At the bash he'll most likely take up smoking too. And the last thing we want is for Jesse to start bumming PPS's head honcho's cubans. Heck, we'll be thrown out of PPS and excommunicated by the Malaysian blogging community. Heh!

    Actually, I have been looking forward to the bash. It'll be great to meet up with the people I read - do that handshake thing, and that mingling bit, and probably that eating thing. Unfortunately, it will be a weeknight and that might not work out for us since we'll have nowhere to dump the kid. And much as we'd like to bring him along, that might not be a good idea. It'll probably go past his bedtime. Besides, the place - like any self-respecting nightspot, might be too smokey for him. So it looks like we'll have to give this one a miss. I apologize.

    I have also been looking forward to Peter's blogger-meet at MidValley (Is this the month for Malaysian bloggers or what?). Unfortunately, due to some weird cosmic event that seems to be yanking me away from you wonderful blogfolks, I will be working this Sunday.

    Well, I hope the lot of you will turn out for the events - especially PPS2ABB. I fully expect it to be a momentous occasion in the annals of modern history. Think Woodstock. Or Band Aid. Or Charles and Camilia. Or that time when Pamela Anderson got her... erm... stuffings removed. So go and be a part of history. If you do go, drink some beer, light up a stogie and eat some ribs on my behalf. *sniff*

    Even though my person will not be there with you, my heart will surely be. And yeah, probably my stomach too.

    Tuesday, June 7, 2005

    You Can't Leave the Light On

    Recently, Mae forwarded me an email titled, Sleeping with the light on raises child leukaemia. I dismissed it as a hoax along with those other urban legends chain mail.

    "Aren't you even concerned?" Mae started her guilt campaign. If it were up to her, we'd be living in darkness from now on. Because Mae, despite being the voice of reason in our home, was also a little more gullible than the average person (Hehh, I'm so going to die for writing this!). With the barrage of chain mails that come into our mailboxes these days, don't be surprised if one day Mae convinces me to send all our money to Uganda, stop using shampoo, stop drinking Coke, forward all our emails to all our friends so that Walt Disney will give us money and relocate to the mountains. Hehehheh!

    To stop her from bugging the sanity out of me, I decided to verify the information. And whaddya know, it turns out Mae was right:
    Increased exposure to unnatural night-time light and the resultant reduced capacity to produce melatonin may be one of the reasons for the steady rise in childhood leukaemia over the past century.
    This is terrible news. More so, if your kid's afraid of the dark - which is a subject that deserves an entry of its own. Anyway, our bedroom is pitch black these days. Which is fine with all of us, except that I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and give myself a big fat shock when I can't see Jesse in between us. I think I need night vision goggles.

    No, no, no, I don't want night vision goggles for myself. It's not like that at all. This is really for Jesse's sake. Think of how much night vision goggles can help us become effective and better parents, especially for night feeds. *ahem*

    Monday, June 6, 2005

    Cottage Hakka Noodles


    the Hakkas do it better


    Most of the eateries that I have ever reviewed or recommended in this blog have been places that were recommended to me. But here's a place that Mae and I found on our very own. :) The few times we had passed by the place at night, we had found it a little too quiet. Almost too quiet to be serving up anything great anyway. How wrong we were!

    Cottage Noodles Cafe sits in a quiet location along Jalan SS22/25 in Damansara Jaya. That's the road around Atria Shopping Centre, just around the corner from Domino's Pizza. Here, they serve one of the loveliest Hakka Noodles I have ever tasted. The signature dish here is a konlo (dry, non-soupy) noodle. It is a springy handmade Hakka noodle tossed in a generous helping of mince pork gravy served with crisp, thick beans sprouts and garnished with spring onions in a delectable concoction that will have you begging for more. The secret of this dish is definitely in the restaurant's special mince pork sauce. Sauteed in some aromatic secret ingredient, the sauce is the perfect accompaniment to Cottage's excellent handmade noodles. This simple, unpretentious yet superbly delicious dish is what makes us return time and time again.



    The place also serves up a killer curry noodles. Now while curry noodles aren't exactly unique, Cottage Noodles Cafe makes up for it with a thick curry broth over it's very own flat-type, fettucini-like Hakka noodle. Side dishes include a good assortment of Yong Tow Foo. Mae and I always order the shop's Deep Fried Sui Kow - a meat, shrimp and chives dumpling that they fry to golden brown perfection. And believe me when I say this goes perfectly with the curry noodles.

    We were here over the weekend. This time around, we noticed some additional items in the menu; namely the Stewed Duck/Lotus Tuber with Hakka Noodles; Stewed Mushrooms and Chicken Feet in Hakka Noodles; and finally, Stewed Swine Leg in Hakka Noodles. This would fall under the establishment's premium dishes, retailing at RM9 a pop. Otherwise, the food here is pretty affordable going for RM3.50 for the Hakka Noodles and RM5.00 for the Curry Noodles. We'll probably get around to these new dishes when we've had enough of our regular fix of Hakka Noodles. That could take awhile.

    Finally, one of the best testament of the quality of the food in a restaurant is when the proprietor sits down to a hearty meal of his own stuff. On our way out we were pleasantly surprised to find Cottage Noodle Cafe's head honcho, Phillip, pigging at his Stewed Duck. I snapped a shot of him and explained that I would be blogging about it. So if you head on over to Cottage, don't forget to look up Phillip and get him to give you a discount - or maybe a couple of Deep Fried Sui Kows on the house. Hehehh!

    Here's a little trivia for you. The Hakkas are a bunch of people originally from Northern China. While I can't say that I know very much about them I have heard that Hakka women are a fierce and fiesty lot, known to beat up their husband at the slightest whim. Hahahaha! Maybe that's why their noodles pack a punch! I have heard people say that you should never marry a Hakka woman, unless you have a deathwish. But what do I know? I'm a Hainanese. Our people are supposed to be crazy. Oh well. :)

    Friday, June 3, 2005

    PPS Sucks Eggs!

    The PPS 2nd Anniversary is just around the corner. I was nominated for the Project Petaling Street Blog Awards in 2 separate categories. However, I have been dropped like a hot potato from the running. This sucks. How will I ever explain to my infant son that nobody wanted to vote him?

    PPS sucks man! C'mon, people!!! He's just a kid. Feh!

    Yes, the voting booth is open. Unfortunately, LoopyMeals will not be in the running. This is a tragic turn of events. As such, I have commission special T-shirts to commemorate PPS... erm... suckiness. All tees come in any size you like, as long as it's XL. It retails for RM 99.90. Cheap! All proceeds will go to a good cause - mainly to nurse my wounded ego. Please remit your money directly into my account.




    Heh. Didn't someone say an idle mind is the devil's workshop? It was either this or a video of me doing some creepy victory jig. :)

    Thursday, June 2, 2005

    ShuMai Supreme


    the mother of all shumai


    In a quaint little Chinese coffee shop, tucked away in heart of Taiping town, a bunch of old guys make the best ShuMai on the planet.

    ShuMai, if you've every eaten DimSum, is the signature dish for this evergreen Chinese cuisine. It is a small, bite-size steamed dumpling of shrimps, crab meat, pork, water chestnuts and other stuff, enveloped in a thin rice pastry and garnished with shrimp roe on top. In most DimSum restaurants around the world, ShuMai is served in a threesome of dumplings, in a saucer. However, in Kwan Kee Restaurant in Taiping they serve their ShuMais in twos. Because at Kwan Kee, they don't just sell ShuMais, the sell the Mother of all ShuMais!!!

    Our ShuMai in Taiping, like most things from Taiping (*ahem*), are larger than life. Hehh! Actually, they're double the size of most ShuMais you get in Malaysia. With a generous helping of ingredients packed compactly in every dumpling, you get the springiest ShuMais in the world. And here at Kwan Kee their family recipe, an heirloom passed on from generation to generation, is a closely-guarded secret. Which is why the Kwan Kee ShuMai remain peerless in this little town of Taiping.

    Mom brings the stuff from Taiping every time she visits. This time around, she brought a couple of thousands. However, since she is staying over at my uncle's this visit, I was not able to hoard the stuff all to myself. As a result my relatives, the ravenous wolves that they are, devoured everything in sight leaving only a measly three dumplings for me. Buttheads!

    Perhaps it's time to go home to Taiping once again. :) And oh, if you're looking for the place, it's a few doors down from the Taiping Old Clock Tower along Jalan Kota, opposite the Guardian Pharmacy.

    Wednesday, June 1, 2005

    Shhhh...

    Don't ask. Don't tell. Thank you. From the heart of my bottom. :)

    Momma's Boy

    Today is my mother's birthday. Which is great since she just so happened to be in town. That means she gets to celebrate it with her family, her kids and her grandson. Gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling inside.

    On the other hand, I think I tend to gush and fuss over my mother a little too much. And that gets a little creepy. Think Anthony Perkins in Psycho. Or that Michael Myers fella in Halloween. Or the entire male population of Singapore. Hahahhah! Okay, that last one was a cheap shot, but a Singaporean chick once told me that the guys down south have this fixation on their mommies.

    Anyway, I've always been some kind of Momma's Boy.

    And for some reason, Jesse too is turning out to be a Momma's Boy. It's infuriating sometimes how he only wants Mae to carry him. And at nights when we put him to bed, Mae and I usually play with him on our bed. We'd play Hide 'n Seek and the boy will look for us as we hide behind pillows. There was time when he'd declare Game Over when he found Mae, leaving poor Daddy to remain hidden in the sheets, unwanted and alone. *sniff*

    Despite being a Momma's Boy myself, it doesn't change the fact that Momma's Boy Jesse gets on my nerves. Which leads me to believe that nobody likes a Momma's Boy. Except his Momma, of course.

    Mae had better make me a Daddy's Girl soon.