Friday, October 1, 2004

Cheerleaders of Shit

Yes, it has finally come down to this. These days, Mae and I are officially Cheerleaders of Shit.

We've gotten quite adept at being parents. Considering Jesse is only 5-weeks old, we've pretty much got his major signals down to pat. That fake-ish sounding cry means he wants to eat. The real cry complete with tears means he wants to eat NOW! But when he does that hysterical-kick-and-scream-complete-with-tears-and-quivering-lips cry, that means he's gonna poop.

We'll rush him to his changing pad, remove his diapers and wait. And that's when we'll do our grunts and groans to egg him on. "Nngggggghh! Come on boy. Do it! Do it!" Both of us, in unison. Like cheerleaders. Hahhahha!

Here's the thing: Just when he's about to go, he's all quite and cooperative. That, my friends, is the calm before the storm. If you ever underestimate that, you'll get baby poo all over the place. We have learnt this the hard way.

I used to think that I could never do this icky thing - changing diapers and wiping shit. But it comes so naturally now. I guess this is what love is all about. Yup, that right. True love is wiping shit. :)

We tell Jesse, "Son, one day when your parents are old and incontinent, and wearing Depends, you better return the favour." He had better.

Oh, by the way, for all of you who ever wondered why some confinement ladies prefer formula to mother's milk here it is: Formula babies shit only once a day while kids on mother's milk poop a lot. And more poop means more work. So there. Do the math.

23 comments:

  1. :lol: How cute...and...icky! :p

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  2. may u have someone wipe ur shit when u are old james...

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  3. *dies laughing* reading about poo poo is juz too funneee... n god knows i need some laughter juz about now! must egg it on some more??? *faints*
    but i do agree, true love includes er... 'wiping shit' in ur own words. my dad used to help me 'go' when i had trouble 'going'! *dies* *SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH* dun tell neone!
    Tats an interesting fact, shall tell me sister that! And depends???? HMMMMM....

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  4. awww..feel all warm and fuzzy for u and baby and mae!

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  5. Yeah. I am lucky enough to see the cheerleaders duo in action. And boy! This Jesse Boy sure poo-ed a lot!

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  6. THAT is a lot of shit for a small guy.

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  7. Yeah, but mother's milk is SO much better for both mummy and baby!!

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  8. james - you crack me up sometimes! hugs to mae and jesse.

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  9. Love that statement! True love is not never having to say "I'm sorry", it's "wiping shit". Cool!

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  10. hahahaaaaaaaa.... true love is wiping shit?! gimme a S gimme a H gimme a...

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  11. james, breastfed babies poo poo less than formula milk babies. btw, breastfed poo poo doesn't stink like formula milk does. ;)

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  12. oh, confinement ladies prefer formula milk because baby sleeps longer. breastfeeding is like once every 2 hours! Pity the mummy.

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  13. True (on the breastfeeding)..plus Mae has to watch what she eats, or else, Jesse's poo will turn all funny colours!

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  14. the part of formula milk vs breast milk is intriguing. Though what those confinement ladies do is really bad. For the baby cannot produce the necessary antibodies he/she needs in the future.
    what's wrong with pooping ? it's a natural process, and with a baby which is less than 6 months old..a mother's breast milk is definitely the better choice. And yes they do poop more, but the more poop that comes out means that the body system is working properly and anything in the tummy of a baby which is septic can and will be removed.

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  15. do you use pom-poms?

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  16. Buaya69 says:
    "Breastfed definitely better, Wife's breasts definitely bigger"
    :lol:

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  17. "can i touch jesse?" Kev, do you even know how creepy that sounds? Geez! :lol:
    Hmm, I never knew that, Zsarina - about the colors thing. Still I heard that mommies who eat lotsa fish produce lotsa DHA.
    What was that, Natasha? Patty Poop? Hehheh!
    To the confinement ladies' credit, Leo, breastfeeding can sometimes be taxing to a new mother. We're talking long feeding sessions at all the most ungodly hours.
    Tiny ones, Grace. We call 'em cotton balls! :lol:
    Buaya, buaya! ;)

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  18. well yes ..the ungodly hours ARE unGODly, but as a mother...one should be happy to take care of their offspring.
    unless you really want aunty to run away with jesse =p

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  19. James: Cheh...so are other things. ;)

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  20. *lol* so now we're having a discussion on the poop & milk thingy? :P Will jot down this piece of information unto my 'how to be a great future dad' book. Haha~

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