Thursday, April 8, 2004

Dead Weight

get off of me, you pig!

I've been gaining a bit of weight. Okay. A lot of weight. Which is a bad thing under normal circumstances. But with Baby on the way, the extra pounds is just gonna weigh me down when I need to start keeping up with the little tyke!

This is all Mae's fault. She makes me eat everything that she cannot finish. "Honey, I can't eat this. You eat it. That's right boy, lap it up like the greedy little pig that you are!" And I obey. Okay, okay, so a exaggerate a little. Most of the time she just says, "Honey, I can't eat this." And then I'll lap it up like the greedy pig that I am. What can I say. I love food.

Today I've decided to start a new fitness regime. Since I don't have time for gym, I shall skip. Every opportunity I get. At home. At work. Everywhere. I will no longer stand. I will no longer walk. Instead, I shall skip. I will be like Skipinder the Punjabi Kangaroo (does anyone know this or am I the only one who watched it?). Skip, skip, skip. I shall skip until I lose 12 kgs by the end of April. And after that, we'll talk about muscles. Is this a plan or what?

When Baby arrives, he will be greeted by Daddy the Master of the Universe, the Contender for Mr. Olympia. He will not be greeted by Daddy the Bucket of Lard. Wish me luck.


  1. :lol: don't worry james, jog 2-3 times a week for 20 minutes and you will see results.

  2. skipinder the alcoholic kangaroo!! :D I'm cutting down on food and been exercising more too, after putting on 5KGS in 3 months... hope it works

  3. Since you are so fat, you should do something which doesnt cost your knee's synovial fluid to exhaust. Joint pains.
    You better go for low impact exercise, like swimming in your shit tank 3x a week. (remember your resolution before u move into your house??)
    I remembered you hurt your knee before. Being Skipinder the Punjabi Kangaroo will make it worse.
    you will end up as Daddy, the Limpy Lard instead.

  4. james..ur making pregnancy and sex sound so bad...:lol:

  5. Haha! Shucks, 12kgs by the end of April? Gosh I want to do that! Don't worrylah, I'm sure the little tyke will help you lose the weight soon enough.

  6. Aaah pickyin, so THAT'S how you stay "a sexy young woman"! :)
    Is that skepticism I smell, graceshu?
    You're a dancer lah, ryuu. How can you ever be fat?
    Hmm. Funny how it never occurs to me to cut down on food, Norzu. Even now!! :lol:
    Short and sweet, raZZbeRRy!
    Gina, you wet blanket! *piak*
    Wei phoenix. Where got sex lah? Hahahah... your imagination is very fertile.
    Fat (*ahem*) hopes, eh? If it doesn't work, Messy Christian then its Plan B - up to Baby! :)

  7. skippender who???
    I always come up it great excercise regimes and quick weight loss plans too..but always give up after like th efirst week. Heres to hoping you have more will power then i do!!!
    And if u really do lose 12 kgs by the end of April, bugger ur becoming my new inspiration! =)

  8. Always come up it??!? Wht the heck? The second sentence was supposed to be come up WITH. Chorry aa, sometimes the england not so powderful..

  9. Hey James. I thought you look fit enough! But then again, it's been like... half a year since I saw you!
    I went on a 10 day detox. I lost 3 kgs.
    All the best to your exercise regime :)

  10. Think it's the trappings of being

  11. Skipinder! Haven't you ever seen Goodness Gracious Me, annu? As for my regime... hmm... Day 2 isn't going so well... :lol:
    You're such a liar, Shine! :) I haven't look fit enough since I got hitched and you know it!
    Definitely the age, Sir7. The older you get, the less you care about your weight. And then the Mid-life crisis hits and you start worrying all over again! :lol: Erm... mine is not mid-life crisis, ok!

  12. You made me laugh out loud with this one coz I had the same thought, James. Have yet to skip a step though! And that was MONTHS ago!!

  13. funnily enough, not one reader suggested the atkins diet. hmmm.

  14. cos the atkins diet is not exactly a good diet programme. frankly speaking, a balance diet & regular exercise is the way to go, james. u can do it!!!

  15. Hey irene, great minds think alike. Unfortunately lousy willpower reacts alike too! :)
    Jack, dieting is for people with willpower. :lol:
    I heard that too, oliviasy! We'll see... :)

  16. James the Hainanese boy, love your writing! Good luck with the pregnancy...good to know you are as involved as the Mom (well, almost-lah) in the waiting game. And - yes - good luck with the exercise.....I can never skip without tripping..LOL....I would ask you to go for salsa but your wife may not appreciate you holding other women while she's waddling around with your baby inside...:-)

  17. Thanks, Zsarina! BTW, the only salsa I know is made of chillies and tomatoes and I dip my chips in them! :lol:

  18. I LOVE GGM! priceless stuff...